How To/How Not To Help

17 Dec

Don’t just say “let me know if you need anything” or “call me whenever you need anything” or any variation of this. Chances are that I won’t. You should be direct and specific. If you’re going to the store or something, say “I’m going to the store right now, do you need anything?” Chances are, I’ll probably need a few things. Bring me some food (check what I can and can’t eat, first) or offer to help me clean my apartment. Don’t expect that I can go out anywhere with you, because I probably won’t have that kind of energy. If you want to just “talk” because I seem upset, then talking about all the things that make me upset, and telling me what you think I should do probably won’t make me any less upset. You’re probably just going to stress me out. That’s all. I know you’re just trying to help, and I hate to complain about something as great and thoughtful as that, but that’s just how I feel.

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