Tag Archives: psychologist

Steroid Girl: My Life as an Insomniac

7 Apr

Part II

I went to the psychiatrist last Tuesday, and she said that I have major depression after looking at the survey I filled out. We didn’t do too much talking, but I wrote everything down on one of the forms while I was in the waiting room, and she read it. So she gave me Abilify because it works in a matter of 3 or 4 days instead of 4-6 weeks like the other SSRIs that they normally use. She also gave me a vitamin that’s supposed to make the Abilify more effective and she prescribed Ambien instead of the Ambien CR that I’d taken before. She said I’d feel less drugged the next day. The Ambien does make me sleepy, and I yawn a lot, but I still feel a little drugged and sleepy the next day, and I still haven’t been able to sleep through the night with it. She said to come see her this coming Thursday and to see my counselor 2x a week instead of once a week. They decided that I shouldn’t sleep by myself, so tonight will be my first night back in my apartment after staying with friends and my brother’s godmother and such. The psychiatrist is friends with my counselor, and she went to med school where I go now. Oh yeah, and not only did she have a couch (which I sat on), she also had a recliner and a big arm chair. She had a book called “All Cats Have Asperger’s” and a box of tissues that looks like the tissues are coming out of a man’s nose. The psychiatrist wanted the counselor to call her during our appointment so that they could talk about how depressed I’ve been, and now I have to call the counselor like twice a day =/. Also, my stomach has been hurting a lot, but I guess that’s kinda normal at this point. Just rolling with that one. The whole counseling thing is becoming as much of a burden as the depression/anxiety, though, and I’m not even sure if it’s working.

Highs and Lows

20 Mar

I’m getting sick, which SUCKS!! Especially since I have a test Friday and a cruise coming up! I talked to my professors for this test block, though, and I’m getting a few accommodations for this exam, so the stress level is a little lower.

Also, as per my psychologist…I’m not allowed to stay alone anymore. I have to check in with her every night and tell her who I’m staying with, so we’ll see how that goes. -__-

On a lighter note, I aced the physiology miniboard!!! 7 points higher than the national average! That means I get enough bonus points to raise my OS1 grade a whole letter grade!!! I’m pretty sure God took that miniboard for me. I didn’t study for it. I was already mentally prepared to retake it this summer.

Major Rambling Alert

5 Feb
Having another down day today. I talked to the counselor here, and…I’m pretty sure I felt worse afterwards. It wasn’t anything she said, but I just kind of thought she would help more or…it just made me think of all the things I’m depressed about at once, I guess. All I know is that after the appointment, I couldn’t stop crying…and I didn’t expect for it to be like that.
I tried reaching out to a classmate of mine, but he said that since he has to wake up early tomorrow he can’t talk…and it was like…6 PM. I mean, I’m sure he’s busy or whatever, but I don’t think that was the problem. I think he was just…uncomfortable maybe? I don’t know. I just…he said I could call him whenever I need to talk, so I did…and yeah, I guess I can’t actually call him whenever. So……..that made me feel even worse, and then I fell asleep for a little.
I’ve been so tired recently. I pretty much slept all day, and still could hardly force myself to wake up for the appointment today. I usually have trouble sleeping, but now it’s harder to stay awake. I’ve had a lot of pain today, too. And uh…had a bit of an “accident” which was superĀ embarrassing. I have some nerve damage from the bowel resection surgery I got, and so…yeah, that happens sometimes.
I can’t eat any food right now, so it’s all IV nutrition. I’m ok with this, because eating is just complicated now, but I’m sure this won’t help with the weight issue…but I guess that’s the least of my worries today. But…I am kind of craving a “cutie” now…you know those little oranges that are super easy to peel and they’re small and adorable?
Yeah, that.