Tag Archives: shingles

Stupid Cancer!

28 Aug

The other day I passed out in the shower and got a concussion. That’s just what I needed in addition to the shingles and bleeding and…well…cancer. A concussion. It’s like the little cherry on top! It’s actually more like a ‘kick me when I’m down’ kind of moment. But I like the cherry on top idea better. It works, too, because I don’t like those little red cherries. Anyways, I’m back at school, so it’s ok, I’m ok. I just have a massive headache and it’s kinda hard to concentrate, but we’re learning about cancer in class right now, so it’s not like that’s something I have no idea about. Ugh. I’m like the class ‘resident cancer expert’ so everyone is asking me for help with the carcinogenesis and neoplasms chapters. At least this cancer is useful for something.

I’m not producing enough of my own red blood cells, so I’m getting pretty anemic. It’s a problem with both myelosuppression and lack of EPO because of decreased kidney function. That’s most likely why I passed out. I threw up basically all day yesterday, so I didn’t even try to eat or even use the PEG tube. Or as Randi so affectionately called hers, “Peggy.” I am having a cup of tea right now, but I can tell that it’s not going to stay down. I’m already getting those waves of heat all over with the chills and cold sweats that I usually get when I’m going to throw up. My apartment is kind of a mess. I haven’t been putting my clothes away when I take them off..just haven’t really had the energy to do it, so there are clothes scattered about, and my parents are going to come visit me and my mom will NOT appreciate the condition my apartment is in. She’s the kind of person that before she comes over, I need to vacuum, dust, polish, and scrub everything or she’ll have to make some kind of comment. But then she usually winds up cleaning it. My clean and her clean are two completely different things. I don’t think I could ever clean up to her standards. I don’t know what she sees when she looks at things. But I don’t have the energy for all of that. I’ll just pick up my clothes and call it a day, and she’ll complain, and I’ll be like, ‘I was too tired’ and she’ll understand and clean for me. >_<

There’s this guy at school that likes me. He’s a first year, but he’s a year older than me. He wants to take me to dinner sometime. I haven’t told him that eating isn’t really a thing that’s high on my list, but…I suggested something else like the aquarium. I have a year pass, so i might as well use it as many times as I can before the year ends. Or maybe the art museum would be cool. I don’t know what he’s into, but I think he’d like just going anywhere with me. He’s lived in this city for years now, and I’ve lived here for a year. I haven’t gotten out much to explore the city, so he wants to take me to a few places to see some random things around here. Sounds cool to me. Oh, and he’s from Sudan and he has family there and in Egypt. It’s pretty cool. He also speaks 3 languages: Arabic, English, and some nubian language that I forgot the name of. English was his 3rd language, he learned it when he was about 12. It just feels nice to have some human connection and interaction like that in person again. I miss that. 🙂 He doesn’t know about all the health stuff and I don’t really wanna tell him and run him off, but it was kinda obvious I guess, and he didn’t seem to mind, but he doesn’t know any details or anything. Gah! Stupid cancer.

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Blood and Shingles

23 Aug

Last night I wasn’t feeling very well, so I went to sleep a little early. I woke up in the middle of the night and felt really wet. When I looked at my pillow, it looked really dark, so I turned on the light and started choking. There was bright red blood all over my pillow and I was choking on blood. It was coming from my throat and coming out of my mouth. I went to the bathroom and kind of just let it drip into the sink while I called 911. I was scared…again. Things like this keep happening. I’m wondering if that’s a really bad sign or what. So I went to the hospital, and they did a bronchoscopy. They told me that there was a ruptured vessel in my lung, and that they gave me tranexamic acid, as well as did an embolization and used a laser during the bronchoscopy. I’m not choking up blood anymore, so that’s good.

Last night, I also discovered a very painful rash on my trunk area, and I didn’t know what it was. They noticed it as well, and I was started on an antiviral medication and some medications to treat the pain, as they believe that it’s shingles. I was really hoping that it wasn’t shingles. 😦 The medication that I’m on for the purpura rash should help the shingles to not be as bad, though. I hope that’s true!